Woman of Many Hats

Hello, I am Jen Martin: teacher, writer, widow, wife, mother, daughter and I have MS. My world is one filled with so much and I am truly blessed. I have an amazing six-year-old named Heather. She is my everything. I have been through a lot in my thirty-eight years. I lost my husband October 23, 2007 after six hours of surgery. He had ulcers all through his stomach and up to his esophagus. His official cause of death was---an enlarged heart. After loosing him, I found myself. After being with him for twelve and a half years, I figured out my reason for being. It wasn't just to be the woman of many hats, it was to be a person that is taking part in the world of the living.
After dealing with so much in my life during 2007, which included my MS diagnosis, I realized that it was important for me to realize that I MATTERED. Everything I did in my life---MATTERED. So, I started to be that person I was always meant to be. I started to live. I looked at my daughter, then four and saw that, in order for her to respect me and know her OWN self worth, I had to be the TRUE me. And, I am thankful to say that I am.
I met a man named Kevin who truly changed my life. He dragged me out of the despair I was in and made me see the truth, made me see the beauty that is me. I am not talking about anything superficial, I am talking about the raw beauty you hope to find in yourself. This, I found in me. After too many years of appeasing the world, I finally was true, real to the core. I was, in a sense, naked to the world, baring myself in raw emotion.
In meeting Kevin, I found the me that I wanted to be. Now, I am not condoning the idea that it takes a man to "find yourself" or that you need a man, because---you don't. You need love of yourself. I found this before I met Kevin, but he helped me to hold onto what was important to me. I am so much more than the woman of many hats. I just had to look in the mirror and then dare, like Alice, to go through it and beyond. Welcome to my journey.